Shmoozel's Journal Article

They call me Shmoozel, and I’m sure many of you are wondering how I got my name. Well it all started back in 1824 when my great grandfather asked a chicken “why did you cross the road?” and the chicken responded “who says I crossed the road, maybe the road crossed me?” it was at that moment that Shmoozel was created.
Shmoozel is not only another word or name; it defines the entertainment and enjoyment in life which we all seek. When seeking this we often resort to different methods of Shmoozeling.
The first is by having people race each other on a platform while a Shmoozel wears funny clothing and dances to a sneezing type of Hachoo Hachoo Hachoo Tzigezunt song.
The second method is by all Shmoozelers taking flashlights and looking for stuff or staff around camp.
The third method is by learning new songs that are printed on a 4X6 colored surface, and singing them until we know them well enough to teach them to our children and grandchildren for generations to come.
The fourth method is by watching someone act crazy, be it a black janitor, Arab, Shmaryonke/scavenger dude, or just someone who is looking for the Kosel, we always know we can rely on him to satisfy our Shmoozel needs.
All these methods could not have been done without you laughing. The Committee for the furtherance of Shmoozelification would also like to thank former NAD Ziggy for being the partner in Shmaryonke crime. But the real thank you goes to the Rebbe, just ask Nissi.
I know some of you can’t believe that you are going back to school and you won’t hear Menachem screaming or campers dreaming or staff are cleaning or AC’s freezing, I’m gonna lose my mind, and you think that all of your Shmoozel is gone forever, but do not fear, we have invented a way for you to enjoy much more Shmoozelism on a special website which was free because I be proud to be a Jew, they won’t make fun of you, called which will lead you to where you can learn the tunes of all the Shmoozel songs, and hear more Shmoozel stories and have a Shmoozel time.
Many of you I am sure still have question which need answering, like “what is Shmoozel’s real voice?” or “which bunk won the string hunt?” or “why did the chicken cross the road?” or “where does Ibivigidihivizichitiyikichiliminisieipifitzikirishisitisi come from?” which only a Shmoozelrific person can answer, therefore feel free to dial a Shmoozel at 347-931-8455 or email shmulabula @ where a Shmoozel representative will be waiting to answer all your questions.
Bottom line, I had a great summer and you all made me laugh more than I made you, so thank you very much and please remember that your Mitzvah will bring Moshiach now!
Your crazy wacky blown totally normal night activity director,
Shmoozel Leemanov
P.S. Please don’t put what I am about to write in the journal, I am only writing this for the editor of the journal which I believe is Leibelovitch, please don’t tell the campers that my real name is Shmuli Zalmanov and that Shmoozel Leemanov is really just a way of mixing up my real name, because then they will know the secret and their brain might explode. This is not a joke.
P.S.S. It is actually a big joke. What did you expect from a night activity director?
P.S.S.S.S. Have a Shmoozeldiker year!